WEBVTT

00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.280
Hello, and welcome to the Frankly Speaking podcast. Today, I am joined by my lovely wife, Annie.

00:00:06.280 --> 00:00:07.280
Hello.

00:00:07.280 --> 00:00:29.980
And we will cover the rest of our marriage journey, hopefully. We'll see how much of it we get through, but last time we had just been kicked out, almost evicted from our last condo together, and we have basically each decided to get our own apartments because we thought, "Oh, are we just dating each other out of convenience? Maybe it's like too early to move in together."

00:00:29.980 --> 00:00:33.560
Because we had only known each other for a couple of months at that point.

00:00:33.560 --> 00:00:35.880
Like one month at that time?

00:00:35.880 --> 00:00:37.880
One or two, I don't remember.

00:00:37.880 --> 00:00:59.960
Yeah, and then I kind of found like two other girls on Facebook Marketplace and moved into, it was a two-bedroom apartment with two baths, and one of the girls also lived in the living room, and then we kind of just like split up the payments that way.

00:00:59.960 --> 00:01:05.860
And I was there for about three months until we decided, like, okay, let's actually move together.

00:01:05.860 --> 00:01:05.860
Yeah, and then the place I moved into was also a two-bedroom, two-bath, but I really didn't like my roommate that much. Let's call him Brad.

00:01:05.860 --> 00:01:11.760
Brad was totally normal whenever I would talk to him, and then he would like complain to Annie behind my back.

00:01:11.760 --> 00:01:17.660
And then he would like complain to Annie behind my back, like he was so passive-aggressive.

00:01:17.660 --> 00:01:21.660
He never actually like told me he had any problems with me, but then he would like complain to Annie all the time.

00:01:21.660 --> 00:01:33.560
Yeah, so I don't know if Frank is oblivious or something, but he would like go and eat Brad's food.

00:01:33.560 --> 00:01:43.460
He would literally offer me his food. He'd be like, "Hey, do you want to eat this thing?"

00:01:43.460 --> 00:01:43.460
I'd be like, "Yeah, okay."

00:01:43.460 --> 00:01:57.360
So one time I just like went to visit Frank, and then Brad was like, "Hey, can you tell Frank to stop eating my bread?"

00:01:57.360 --> 00:02:06.260
Yeah, I don't remember this. And like I guess he never said anything to me, like in any form.

00:02:06.260 --> 00:02:12.260
He would always just complain to Annie, and then I would like go do whatever thing he said, but that was extremely annoying.

00:02:12.260 --> 00:02:17.860
Like I would have preferred if he just told me to my face rather than complain to my girlfriend.

00:02:17.860 --> 00:02:24.260
But anyways, yeah, I was getting sick of living with Brad, and Annie pretty much stayed over every night anyways.

00:02:24.260 --> 00:02:28.260
So it's not like she was getting the value out of her own apartment.

00:02:28.260 --> 00:02:31.260
When did we, like why did we decide to live together?

00:02:31.260 --> 00:02:39.160
He was subletting to me, and we had the option to basically renew the lease, and I didn't want to room with him.

00:02:39.160 --> 00:02:44.160
But I really liked where we were staying, so I basically found a place that was one floor below.

00:02:44.160 --> 00:02:53.160
And I thought, "Okay, this is like a pretty good deal. It was cheaper than like both of what we were paying at the time."

00:02:53.160 --> 00:02:59.160
So here's the reason why I didn't want to move out of my existing place with other two girls.

00:02:59.160 --> 00:03:05.160
Because I signed a yearly lease, and they did like extensive background checks on me.

00:03:05.160 --> 00:03:08.160
And should I tell the story? It's super long.

00:03:08.160 --> 00:03:09.160
I don't know, I can't...

00:03:09.160 --> 00:03:10.160
Yeah, up to you.

00:03:10.160 --> 00:03:19.160
So basically, one girl was staying in the master bedroom, and she's got the master bath, and she also has a parking lot.

00:03:19.160 --> 00:03:22.160
So she was paying $1,600.

00:03:22.160 --> 00:03:31.160
I was staying in the second bedroom and sharing a bathroom with a girl in the living room, and I was paying $1,500, which is really reasonable to me.

00:03:31.160 --> 00:03:40.160
I think that was a good deal because I was paying $1,600 at your first condo, and that was just a living room.

00:03:40.160 --> 00:03:51.160
And I think the part that sucks is the girl in the living room is sharing a bathroom with me, and she's also in the living room, and she's also paying $1,300.

00:03:51.160 --> 00:03:55.160
So she's not getting a great deal out of this in comparison.

00:03:55.160 --> 00:04:13.160
And so basically, when I tried to leave, the girl in the living room took this as an opportunity to renegotiate the split, and was like, if I wanted to leave, I would have to basically rent out my room for like $1,600 or $1,700 so that she could have a break.

00:04:13.160 --> 00:04:25.160
And I thought that was really unfair because it's obviously harder for me to rent out or like find someone to sublet my room for $200 extra from what I was paying.

00:04:25.160 --> 00:04:29.160
So I basically didn't want to agree, and they won't let me out of the lease.

00:04:29.160 --> 00:04:38.160
So I was just like, so stressed out because I was still in kind of relatively new country, new city, trying to figure out life.

00:04:38.160 --> 00:04:43.160
And I don't know, I just like didn't want to break the law or anything because I was in this contract.

00:04:43.160 --> 00:04:46.160
And to him, it was just so simple.

00:04:46.160 --> 00:04:50.160
He was just like, "What are you even worried about?"

00:04:50.160 --> 00:04:54.160
And then there was this one day where I was just so stressed.

00:04:54.160 --> 00:04:58.160
It was raining, and I went to pick him up from work.

00:04:58.160 --> 00:05:05.160
And then to add a little bit more color to this, the girl who was in the suite with the en suite bathroom, she was getting a really good deal.

00:05:05.160 --> 00:05:12.160
So she loved that living room bedroom because she was paying really cheap for a one-bedroom private bath compared to Annie.

00:05:12.160 --> 00:05:18.160
And then the other thing that the living room girl probably thought about is since Annie basically wasn't there most of the time anyway,

00:05:18.160 --> 00:05:22.160
like she was technically almost getting that bathroom to herself.

00:05:22.160 --> 00:05:25.160
And like who knew what would happen with the next girl.

00:05:25.160 --> 00:05:33.160
And so like when Annie went to like visit me at work that one day, she was wearing her coat and just like completely drenched.

00:05:33.160 --> 00:05:36.160
And I just like felt so depressed.

00:05:36.160 --> 00:05:39.160
It was like one of those Korean drama scenes.

00:05:39.160 --> 00:05:42.160
Yeah, I still remember it pretty vividly today.

00:05:42.160 --> 00:05:45.160
But yeah, it was in my mind, I was thinking like, who cares?

00:05:45.160 --> 00:05:54.160
Like they're going to have to deal with it because like if you leave and you're not paying like they're going to have to find anyone someone anyways to just make rents or be kicked out.

00:05:54.160 --> 00:05:56.160
And so I felt like it was kind of an empty threat.

00:05:56.160 --> 00:06:00.160
Um, I didn't really understand where a lot of the stress was coming from, I guess, Annie.

00:06:00.160 --> 00:06:01.160
Yeah.

00:06:01.160 --> 00:06:08.160
Well, I worried about my deposit because like, you know, we talked about how expensive the deposits were in San Francisco.

00:06:08.160 --> 00:06:11.160
And my deposit was one and a half times rent.

00:06:11.160 --> 00:06:15.160
So it's like almost what, like $2,000 or something.

00:06:15.160 --> 00:06:17.160
And I worried about getting that back.

00:06:17.160 --> 00:06:18.160
Right.

00:06:18.160 --> 00:06:26.160
So then basically I was telling Annie, like, oh, you just get the next person to like pay the deposit up front, which Annie eventually did find someone.

00:06:26.160 --> 00:06:27.160
Yeah.

00:06:27.160 --> 00:06:32.160
And it all kind of worked out, except that like rents got renegotiated between the three of them.

00:06:32.160 --> 00:06:33.160
I honestly don't know.

00:06:33.160 --> 00:06:38.160
I think basically the first girl, the girl in the master bedroom gave up her parking spot.

00:06:38.160 --> 00:06:46.160
So then the girl in the living room was able to rent out that parking spot for like $200 and to subsidize her rent.

00:06:46.160 --> 00:06:49.160
Um, but yeah, I kind of pulled a fast one on them.

00:06:49.160 --> 00:06:55.160
I basically like found someone for that room without even telling the girls or like getting their approval.

00:06:55.160 --> 00:07:03.160
And I got that girl to like basically sign a contract with me, transfer me the deposit.

00:07:03.160 --> 00:07:06.160
So then I really had nothing to worry about.

00:07:06.160 --> 00:07:07.160
Like I already got my money.

00:07:07.160 --> 00:07:10.160
I didn't care if they didn't figure it out.

00:07:10.160 --> 00:07:13.160
But I think this is like super common in San Francisco.

00:07:13.160 --> 00:07:16.160
Like everyone tries to screw each other over just for money.

00:07:16.160 --> 00:07:18.160
Like things are so expensive.

00:07:18.160 --> 00:07:24.160
You see this type of, you know, like disagreement or like argument all the time.

00:07:24.160 --> 00:07:26.160
It's specifically over rent too.

00:07:26.160 --> 00:07:32.160
Like even with my roommate situation with Brad, his room was like slightly bigger, but we were paying the same amount of money.

00:07:32.160 --> 00:07:41.160
We're paying the same amount of money, which he kind of like conveniently left out before I moved in, which also made me pretty annoyed and like not want to room with him.

00:07:41.160 --> 00:07:51.160
And so, I mean, even after I moved out and moved in with Annie, I still like would get messages from all the time, him all the time asking to like hang out and stuff.

00:07:51.160 --> 00:07:55.160
And I would just kind of ignore him because like, okay, why are you trying to be friends with me?

00:07:55.160 --> 00:08:03.160
You clearly are annoyed with me in many ways, but maybe his like communication style is just like passive aggressive and not confrontational.

00:08:03.160 --> 00:08:04.160
I don't really know.

00:08:04.160 --> 00:08:10.160
While you were living with Brad, I feel like that's when we got more serious with our relationship.

00:08:10.160 --> 00:08:23.160
Yeah, because kind of going back into like how the progression of our relationship, I actually said I love you first, because we did we decided to play this like 32 questions one night.

00:08:23.160 --> 00:08:32.160
And I think one of the last questions in the list was like, if you had died right now, what's one thing that you will regret?

00:08:32.160 --> 00:08:37.160
And I was like, oh, I will regret not saying I love you too, Frank.

00:08:37.160 --> 00:08:45.160
And then he just like made fun of me for saying that, like, and then he was like, I guess I love you too or something.

00:08:49.160 --> 00:08:54.160
And then so I think that happened, like, you know, a month into moving there.

00:08:54.160 --> 00:08:57.160
So at that point, it was like dating each other to get married.

00:08:57.160 --> 00:09:01.160
Eventually, we've been dating for like four or five months at that point.

00:09:01.160 --> 00:09:03.160
Like three months at that time.

00:09:03.160 --> 00:09:04.160
Yeah.

00:09:04.160 --> 00:09:06.160
So we moved in together super early.

00:09:06.160 --> 00:09:09.160
Well, I guess for the second time, because we were originally living together.

00:09:09.160 --> 00:09:16.160
We split up and now we're moving into this new place again, which I was pretty excited about because now we would have our own private place.

00:09:16.160 --> 00:09:18.160
We wouldn't have to worry about roommates.

00:09:18.160 --> 00:09:19.160
Yeah, we could.

00:09:19.160 --> 00:09:22.160
We actually picked up a bunch of like free furniture.

00:09:22.160 --> 00:09:23.160
Oh, my gosh.

00:09:23.160 --> 00:09:24.160
Yeah.

00:09:24.160 --> 00:09:27.160
So, so Frank has like no furniture.

00:09:27.160 --> 00:09:34.160
Like he refuses to get a couch or a dining room table or anything like his bed always just sat on the floor.

00:09:34.160 --> 00:09:35.160
Yep.

00:09:35.160 --> 00:09:40.160
And so we moving to this new place.

00:09:40.160 --> 00:09:45.160
It's just a gigantic living room with a bean bag that he bought just like in the middle.

00:09:45.160 --> 00:09:54.160
And he refuses to get any other furniture besides like a basketball, like one of those arcade basketball hoops, which took up like a quarter of the living room.

00:09:54.160 --> 00:10:01.160
And then we would go dumpster diving, which is one of Frank's favorite activities.

00:10:01.160 --> 00:10:02.160
Yep.

00:10:02.160 --> 00:10:04.160
But it's not really dumpster diving.

00:10:04.160 --> 00:10:14.160
Like because we lived in this like large apartment complex, there's just like one garage with a bunch of like abandoned like furniture that weren't that bad.

00:10:14.160 --> 00:10:24.160
And he would just go and casually like browse and then he will also look on Craigslist for like random furniture that people were getting rid of.

00:10:24.160 --> 00:10:33.160
And there's one time he made us walk like several blocks down this very sketchy area in San Francisco.

00:10:33.160 --> 00:10:42.160
And there was this very large table like the couple was like moving back to Europe and he wanted us to carry it back like by hand.

00:10:42.160 --> 00:10:44.160
Yeah, which I was totally fine with.

00:10:44.160 --> 00:10:46.160
Annie did not have the strength.

00:10:46.160 --> 00:10:49.160
No, it's also very embarrassing.

00:10:49.160 --> 00:10:57.160
And so Annie actually ended up calling it Uber and we put the dining table in the Uber and we also got like a bunch of clothes hangers.

00:10:57.160 --> 00:10:59.160
I think we still have to this day.

00:10:59.160 --> 00:11:02.160
Yeah, we also got a bunch of chairs like folding chairs.

00:11:02.160 --> 00:11:03.160
Oh, yeah, the chairs were nice.

00:11:03.160 --> 00:11:04.160
Yeah.

00:11:04.160 --> 00:11:08.160
And that table stayed with us for three moves.

00:11:08.160 --> 00:11:10.160
Like we took it to Chicago with us.

00:11:10.160 --> 00:11:12.160
We took it back to San Jose with us.

00:11:12.160 --> 00:11:13.160
Yep.

00:11:13.160 --> 00:11:16.160
And we finally got rid of it before we moved back to Canada.

00:11:16.160 --> 00:11:17.160
Yeah.

00:11:17.160 --> 00:11:20.160
I mean, I still wanted to keep it, honestly, but Annie kind of vetoed it.

00:11:20.160 --> 00:11:25.160
And we actually got rid of a lot of our like free furniture that I liked.

00:11:25.160 --> 00:11:28.160
But yeah, I mean, we're in this new place now.

00:11:28.160 --> 00:11:30.160
We have some amounts of furniture.

00:11:30.160 --> 00:11:32.160
I don't think we have a couch at that point.

00:11:32.160 --> 00:11:33.160
Right.

00:11:33.160 --> 00:11:36.160
No, we bought that much later to get a couch.

00:11:37.160 --> 00:11:38.160
We have a photo.

00:11:38.160 --> 00:11:43.160
Maybe I'll put it up like just sitting on his beanbag.

00:11:43.160 --> 00:11:44.160
Yeah.

00:11:44.160 --> 00:11:49.160
So I mean, our relationship is pretty steady at this point.

00:11:49.160 --> 00:11:53.160
I don't remember at what point we actually go on a vacation to Japan.

00:11:53.160 --> 00:11:55.160
Is that in April.

00:11:55.160 --> 00:12:00.160
So we had already lived together for like four months in this new condo together by April.

00:12:00.160 --> 00:12:02.160
I don't really remember.

00:12:02.160 --> 00:12:04.160
I'm sure we fought a lot, but I don't really remember.

00:12:04.160 --> 00:12:11.160
Well, I have a perfect example of you fighting a lot or us fighting a lot.

00:12:11.160 --> 00:12:16.160
So my friend, the same friend that played ping pong with us.

00:12:16.160 --> 00:12:17.160
Oh, yeah.

00:12:17.160 --> 00:12:24.160
So she, her fiance at the time was, you know, working in private equity in San Francisco.

00:12:24.160 --> 00:12:28.160
And she would come to visit him from out of town all the time.

00:12:28.160 --> 00:12:34.160
So when she was in town, I asked Frank to come visit her with me.

00:12:35.160 --> 00:12:42.160
And so it was a night and Frank and I were walking towards her place.

00:12:42.160 --> 00:12:57.160
And we somehow got into an argument basically about how I don't feel comfortable bring him to places with me because he always has this like really mean face on doesn't smile doesn't say hi.

00:12:57.160 --> 00:13:06.160
So it's really hard for me to like bring him out because I feel so much pressure because I feel like he's not going to do a good job like entertaining my friend.

00:13:06.160 --> 00:13:15.160
And then so he got upset at me and just literally left, left me in the middle of the street and was like, I'm not going to deal with this.

00:13:15.160 --> 00:13:16.160
I'm going to go home.

00:13:16.160 --> 00:13:20.160
Let me preface this with every time her friends meet me, they love me.

00:13:20.160 --> 00:13:22.160
So it's completely in Annie's head.

00:13:22.160 --> 00:13:23.160
Like I do great with people.

00:13:23.160 --> 00:13:24.160
I don't like people.

00:13:24.160 --> 00:13:26.160
I don't like people, but people like me.

00:13:26.160 --> 00:13:30.160
I want to, I want to make that point very explicitly clear.

00:13:30.160 --> 00:13:34.160
So I show up to my friend's place.

00:13:34.160 --> 00:13:41.160
Like I think I brought some food or something and I like show up to her place just like crying.

00:13:41.160 --> 00:13:46.160
And she opens the door and she's like, Oh my God, what happened?

00:13:46.160 --> 00:13:51.160
So, needless to say, she does not have a very good first impression of Frank.

00:13:51.160 --> 00:14:00.160
Literally all of her friends have a bad impression of me before meeting me because she'll complain about all of our like dirty laundry and just like nonstop complaints about me.

00:14:00.160 --> 00:14:03.160
And then when they meet me, they're like, Oh, this guy's actually normal.

00:14:03.160 --> 00:14:04.160
And that's not true.

00:14:04.160 --> 00:14:05.160
He's not normal.

00:14:05.160 --> 00:14:12.160
But so the same friend, like she's one of my closest friends and we basically use her as therapy now.

00:14:12.160 --> 00:14:13.160
Like I use her as therapy.

00:14:13.160 --> 00:14:18.160
So every time I see her with Frank, I would just be complaining about Frank the whole time.

00:14:18.160 --> 00:14:21.160
And her personality is very similar to Frank's.

00:14:21.160 --> 00:14:28.160
So she would be like, Oh, I see where you're coming from, but I also see where you're coming from.

00:14:28.160 --> 00:14:30.160
And, you know, talk us through it.

00:14:30.160 --> 00:14:32.160
And I always feel a lot better after.

00:14:32.160 --> 00:14:33.160
Yeah.

00:14:33.160 --> 00:14:42.160
It's funny because when we found out that I was really similar to her in personality type, Annie got very jealous in that moment being like, well, why don't you just marry her then?

00:14:42.160 --> 00:14:43.160
Like, what are you doing with me?

00:14:43.160 --> 00:14:45.160
Like you guys are so similar.

00:14:45.160 --> 00:14:48.160
Well, until you realize that Frank is really difficult to date.

00:14:48.160 --> 00:14:51.160
So if you put a Frank next to another Frank, like they'll never get along.

00:14:51.160 --> 00:14:52.160
I mean, yeah, that's true.

00:14:52.160 --> 00:14:58.160
Like I've met people like guys with similar personality type to me and I don't get along with them very well.

00:14:59.160 --> 00:15:00.160
And so where were we?

00:15:00.160 --> 00:15:01.160
We were just moved in together.

00:15:01.160 --> 00:15:07.160
Oh, we talked about the fights and we were going like, I guess we can skip over to like Japan or something.

00:15:07.160 --> 00:15:08.160
Yeah.

00:15:08.160 --> 00:15:18.160
So I had always planned on going to Japan with my girlfriends in the past, but it just never happened because I would always break up with them before going.

00:15:18.160 --> 00:15:23.160
And so I tried to plan it with Annie being like, oh, maybe this time we'll actually make it.

00:15:23.160 --> 00:15:27.160
And it was going to be a sign whether or not we were going to stay together.

00:15:27.160 --> 00:15:28.160
Like, yeah, work out.

00:15:28.160 --> 00:15:31.160
And like, we almost didn't make it there.

00:15:31.160 --> 00:15:37.160
So like, it was so tumultuous, like what happened on our way there, like a ton of things went wrong.

00:15:37.160 --> 00:15:41.160
Like, like, I think at one point I was almost thinking like, I'm just not going to go on this trip.

00:15:41.160 --> 00:15:42.160
Yeah.

00:15:42.160 --> 00:15:44.160
Like while you were on the flight or something.

00:15:44.160 --> 00:15:45.160
Yeah.

00:15:45.160 --> 00:15:46.160
Like a connecting flight.

00:15:46.160 --> 00:15:47.160
I was like, I should just take a flight.

00:15:47.160 --> 00:15:48.160
Oh, yeah.

00:15:48.160 --> 00:15:49.160
Or go to Iowa or something.

00:15:49.160 --> 00:15:50.160
Oh my gosh.

00:15:50.160 --> 00:16:00.160
Um, but I think that was also the, I think the beginning of the trip was really rough, but it actually ended up being like one of the best trips.

00:16:00.160 --> 00:16:01.160
Yep.

00:16:01.160 --> 00:16:02.160
I know Frank is really impatient.

00:16:02.160 --> 00:16:10.160
So whenever we take a trip together, I always have to be like super, super composed and just like, get my shit together.

00:16:10.160 --> 00:16:12.160
So that we do not explode.

00:16:12.160 --> 00:16:18.160
Um, but what happened was that morning we had a really early flight and Frank is not a morning person.

00:16:18.160 --> 00:16:22.160
He gets really grumpy and he needs like several hours to wake up from sleeping.

00:16:22.160 --> 00:16:25.160
Um, so it was like a 4:00 AM flight or something.

00:16:25.160 --> 00:16:28.160
We leave really early before we left.

00:16:28.160 --> 00:16:30.160
I was like, babe, do you need your wallet?

00:16:30.160 --> 00:16:31.160
And he looked at it.

00:16:31.160 --> 00:16:32.160
No, no, I did.

00:16:32.160 --> 00:16:33.160
I did.

00:16:33.160 --> 00:16:34.160
Did you?

00:16:34.160 --> 00:16:39.160
You looked at it and was like, no, I only need my passport.

00:16:39.160 --> 00:16:45.160
And mind you, before we left, I was like, Oh, I did some research online.

00:16:45.160 --> 00:16:49.160
I was like, you need a lot of cash in Japan because they don't take credit cards.

00:16:49.160 --> 00:16:51.160
And Frank was like, no, I don't need a lot of cash.

00:16:51.160 --> 00:16:53.160
Like I'm just going to bring my card.

00:16:53.160 --> 00:16:54.160
No worries.

00:16:54.160 --> 00:16:59.160
And then against as well, I took out a bunch of cash, like as much as I had.

00:16:59.160 --> 00:17:04.160
So I had about $600, $600 to a thousand, something like that.

00:17:04.160 --> 00:17:05.160
Yeah.

00:17:05.160 --> 00:17:09.160
It wasn't a lot, but I was like, Oh, I'll, you know, well, we can get by, especially he

00:17:09.160 --> 00:17:10.160
has his credit card.

00:17:10.160 --> 00:17:15.160
And that was kind of the idea that I was going to like put out the cash and he was going to

00:17:15.160 --> 00:17:17.160
put anything else on his credit card.

00:17:17.160 --> 00:17:23.160
So we go to the airport and he's sitting there and he's like, I'm really hungry.

00:17:23.160 --> 00:17:24.160
I'm going to go get some food.

00:17:24.160 --> 00:17:32.160
And so he goes and he comes back and he's like, babe, I don't have money for food.

00:17:32.160 --> 00:17:34.160
I didn't bring my wallet.

00:17:34.160 --> 00:17:35.160
Yeah.

00:17:35.160 --> 00:17:38.160
So like at that point we had prepaid for a lot of things.

00:17:38.160 --> 00:17:40.160
So we prepaid for the Airbnbs and hotels.

00:17:40.160 --> 00:17:47.160
We prepaid for our rail pass, which basically lets you use the Japan rail system unlimited

00:17:47.160 --> 00:17:50.160
number of times in like a two week time period or something.

00:17:50.160 --> 00:17:53.160
And then we also prepaid for all of our flights.

00:17:53.160 --> 00:17:55.160
So like our major expenses were paid for.

00:17:55.160 --> 00:17:59.160
The only things that we didn't pay for were just like day to day food.

00:17:59.160 --> 00:18:03.160
And at that point, Annie, like didn't have a lot of cash just in general.

00:18:03.160 --> 00:18:05.160
I just like didn't have a lot of money in general.

00:18:05.160 --> 00:18:06.160
I didn't have a lot of money.

00:18:06.160 --> 00:18:11.160
And so I had like a decent amount and I was thinking like, Oh, I could pay for a lot of

00:18:11.160 --> 00:18:15.160
this because I think at that point we were still splitting rent too.

00:18:15.160 --> 00:18:18.160
And so you were paying slightly more rent than I was.

00:18:18.160 --> 00:18:21.160
But I was basically living like paycheck to paycheck.

00:18:21.160 --> 00:18:22.160
So.

00:18:22.160 --> 00:18:23.160
Yeah.

00:18:23.160 --> 00:18:28.160
And I don't know how I forgot my credit card because in my mind, I thought I had taken

00:18:28.160 --> 00:18:31.160
like one out along with my passport and stuff.

00:18:31.160 --> 00:18:32.160
But I guess I didn't.

00:18:32.160 --> 00:18:39.160
And so the entire trip, we basically have to live on this like $600 budget.

00:18:39.160 --> 00:18:41.160
We actually did manage to get some more cash.

00:18:41.160 --> 00:18:42.160
Yeah.

00:18:42.160 --> 00:18:45.160
So I still had my credit card.

00:18:45.160 --> 00:18:47.160
Like I still had my wallet.

00:18:47.160 --> 00:18:52.160
But my thing is, I don't know why, but every time I go to a new country, I get into this

00:18:52.160 --> 00:18:54.160
like very stingy money saving mode.

00:18:54.160 --> 00:18:58.160
I just don't want to spend any extra like more money than I have to.

00:18:58.160 --> 00:19:03.160
So as soon as Frank told me that he didn't have his wallet, I just like get into this calculation

00:19:03.160 --> 00:19:04.160
phase.

00:19:04.160 --> 00:19:06.160
Like I'm going to get paid next month.

00:19:06.160 --> 00:19:09.160
Once that money comes in, we'll still be in Japan.

00:19:09.160 --> 00:19:12.160
So we have time to take out extra money.

00:19:12.160 --> 00:19:16.160
Like at least on the last like three days of the trip.

00:19:16.160 --> 00:19:22.160
So as long as $600 lasts for like the first seven days or something, like I started calculating

00:19:22.160 --> 00:19:23.160
in my head.

00:19:23.160 --> 00:19:26.160
And for some reason, Frank got mad at me for doing that.

00:19:26.160 --> 00:19:28.160
I was like, why are you so poor?

00:19:28.160 --> 00:19:29.160
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

00:19:29.160 --> 00:19:35.160
I got so upset and sad because I'm like, you're the one that left your wallet and you're blaming

00:19:35.160 --> 00:19:37.160
me for being poor.

00:19:37.160 --> 00:19:38.160
Yeah.

00:19:38.160 --> 00:19:39.160
I'm trying to think back.

00:19:39.160 --> 00:19:43.160
Like in that moment, I was thinking like, ah, this person is so financially irresponsible.

00:19:43.160 --> 00:19:45.160
How did she not have any money?

00:19:45.160 --> 00:19:46.160
Blah, blah, blah.

00:19:46.160 --> 00:19:49.160
But it was definitely like my fault for forgetting my credit card.

00:19:49.160 --> 00:19:52.160
And it's like, it's not that I was financially irresponsible.

00:19:52.160 --> 00:19:53.160
Like I didn't have money.

00:19:53.160 --> 00:19:58.160
I just wanted to be responsible with the way that I, you know, spent it.

00:19:58.160 --> 00:20:04.160
But yeah, it was a super rocky start, like where we like land from our connecting flight.

00:20:04.160 --> 00:20:07.160
And at this point, we're both very mad at each other.

00:20:07.160 --> 00:20:10.160
And I'm thinking like, oh my God, do I even want to go anymore?

00:20:10.160 --> 00:20:12.160
Should I just like take a flight somewhere else?

00:20:12.160 --> 00:20:13.160
Yes.

00:20:13.160 --> 00:20:14.160
Because I still have my phone.

00:20:14.160 --> 00:20:19.160
So I could have booked another flight with my phone or like PayPal or something.

00:20:19.160 --> 00:20:23.160
But we kind of go to Japan and the rest of the trip goes fairly smoothly.

00:20:23.160 --> 00:20:24.160
Yeah.

00:20:24.160 --> 00:20:27.160
Um, the money issued actually didn't affect us at all.

00:20:27.160 --> 00:20:32.160
Like we weren't able to eat really high end places, but we still ate a ton of food.

00:20:32.160 --> 00:20:32.160
Yeah.

00:20:32.160 --> 00:20:35.160
We pretty much got to eat whatever we wanted.

00:20:35.160 --> 00:20:39.160
Um, we just didn't have like a wagyu steak dinner.

00:20:39.160 --> 00:20:42.160
We didn't go to one of those, like a public bath.

00:20:42.160 --> 00:20:47.160
Oh, and we also didn't do like the more expensive tourist attractions.

00:20:47.160 --> 00:20:48.160
Yeah.

00:20:48.160 --> 00:20:53.160
But in general, like we were eating so much every day and we were walking like 17,000 steps

00:20:53.160 --> 00:20:54.160
every day.

00:20:54.160 --> 00:20:55.160
22,000.

00:20:55.160 --> 00:20:56.160
Like, yeah, it was a crazy amount of walking.

00:20:56.160 --> 00:20:59.160
We were basically just walk, eat, walk, eat, walk, eat the entire day.

00:20:59.160 --> 00:21:00.160
Yeah.

00:21:00.160 --> 00:21:05.160
And like traveling with Frank, the best is to just not plan anything.

00:21:05.160 --> 00:21:06.160
Yeah.

00:21:06.160 --> 00:21:09.160
I think we had like specific major attractions, but outside of that, we would not plan like

00:21:09.160 --> 00:21:10.160
on a day to day.

00:21:10.160 --> 00:21:17.160
Um, I guess the best food in Japan actually was from a lot of the convenience stores there

00:21:17.160 --> 00:21:18.160
on every block.

00:21:18.160 --> 00:21:23.160
There's like two or three convenience stores that are open 24 seven and the food is surprisingly

00:21:23.160 --> 00:21:24.160
high quality.

00:21:24.160 --> 00:21:28.160
So like there are seven 11 in Japan, but it's nothing like the seven 11 in the West.

00:21:28.160 --> 00:21:33.160
Like the seven 11 in the West, you think of this like kind of trashy, low grade, terrible

00:21:33.160 --> 00:21:34.160
tasting food.

00:21:34.160 --> 00:21:37.160
But in Japan, it's like a legitimate place to eat.

00:21:37.160 --> 00:21:40.160
Like people will go there after work for a meal.

00:21:40.160 --> 00:21:42.160
It's like one of the best snacks.

00:21:42.160 --> 00:21:44.160
We always ate our breakfast there.

00:21:44.160 --> 00:21:49.160
Cause like nothing opens like, yeah, in the morning earlier than like 11 30 or something.

00:21:49.160 --> 00:21:51.160
So it's like a ghost town.

00:21:51.160 --> 00:21:53.160
If you head out early in the morning.

00:21:53.160 --> 00:21:57.160
Um, and if you do want to take out cash, seven 11 is the only place.

00:21:57.160 --> 00:21:59.160
Seven 11 is the only place to do it.

00:21:59.160 --> 00:22:00.160
Yeah.

00:22:00.160 --> 00:22:04.160
There's probably other places, but like nowhere that was really convenient for us.

00:22:04.160 --> 00:22:09.160
But yeah, in Japan, one thing I was actually a little disappointed by, we went to the fish

00:22:09.160 --> 00:22:11.160
market, which is known to be pretty famous.

00:22:11.160 --> 00:22:14.160
Um, and I didn't think it was that good.

00:22:14.160 --> 00:22:16.160
Like the sushi we ate there.

00:22:16.160 --> 00:22:20.160
I just thought it was, it was actually worse than sushi we'd had in the States.

00:22:20.160 --> 00:22:20.160
Yeah.

00:22:20.160 --> 00:22:23.160
So they only have nigiri and sashimi.

00:22:23.160 --> 00:22:29.160
They never have any of those like double dragon rolls, which is Frank's favorite.

00:22:29.160 --> 00:22:33.160
And because the fish is so fresh, it's very chewy.

00:22:33.160 --> 00:22:38.160
Um, it's not like the frozen fish here where then it gets like softer.

00:22:38.160 --> 00:22:39.160
Yeah.

00:22:39.160 --> 00:22:40.160
I think that's what you like.

00:22:40.160 --> 00:22:44.160
Um, so it totally depends, but like the fish is definitely really fresh.

00:22:44.160 --> 00:22:45.160
Yeah.

00:22:45.160 --> 00:22:48.160
It's fresh, but in my opinion, did not taste that good.

00:22:48.160 --> 00:22:49.160
Yeah.

00:22:49.160 --> 00:22:52.160
Um, the one thing, the best food we had was just noodles in general.

00:22:52.160 --> 00:22:54.160
Like any noodle place we went to would be amazing.

00:22:54.160 --> 00:23:01.160
So whether that's like ramen noodles or like udon, udon, fast food places, like every noodle

00:23:01.160 --> 00:23:05.160
place we went to, regardless of the price was just absolutely amazing.

00:23:05.160 --> 00:23:07.160
And mochi was also the best mochi.

00:23:07.160 --> 00:23:08.160
Yeah.

00:23:08.160 --> 00:23:11.160
We've tried a ton of mochi since coming back, but they've all been pretty bad.

00:23:11.160 --> 00:23:18.160
Um, the only place that we've had good mochi was in this like, uh, Japanese store in Japan,

00:23:18.160 --> 00:23:19.160
Italian, San Jose.

00:23:19.160 --> 00:23:22.160
That was like the only place that even come close.

00:23:22.160 --> 00:23:25.160
Um, but yeah, we're hanging out in Japan.

00:23:25.160 --> 00:23:26.160
We're walking around everywhere.

00:23:26.160 --> 00:23:30.160
Uh, one of the highlights of our trip actually is we go to the city called Nara where you

00:23:30.160 --> 00:23:32.160
can interact with a bunch of deer.

00:23:32.160 --> 00:23:35.160
So they'll let you buy these like crackers and feed the deer.

00:23:35.160 --> 00:23:40.160
And Annie was like getting bullied by these deer because they're super friendly with humans.

00:23:40.160 --> 00:23:41.160
They're very used to it.

00:23:41.160 --> 00:23:42.160
Yeah.

00:23:42.160 --> 00:23:44.160
And so they like go up to her and like bite her and like headbutt her and be like,

00:23:44.160 --> 00:23:45.160
give us these crackers.

00:23:45.160 --> 00:23:46.160
Yeah.

00:23:46.160 --> 00:23:47.160
They get so aggressive.

00:23:47.160 --> 00:23:50.160
And Frank refuses to feed the deer, even though it's.

00:23:50.160 --> 00:23:52.160
I mean, I wasn't interested.

00:23:52.160 --> 00:23:55.160
I'm not, I'm not super into like animals in general.

00:23:55.160 --> 00:23:58.160
Um, but that was actually only like a half day or maybe.

00:23:58.160 --> 00:23:59.160
Yeah.

00:23:59.160 --> 00:24:02.160
We did a half day in Nara and then we went to Osaka.

00:24:02.160 --> 00:24:06.160
I don't remember at what point, but I lose our rail passes.

00:24:06.160 --> 00:24:12.160
So like, Oh, these rail passes, how they work is essentially you, you prepay for them.

00:24:12.160 --> 00:24:17.160
And each of you gets like this train ticket type thing that lets you use the rail an unlimited

00:24:17.160 --> 00:24:18.160
number of times.

00:24:18.160 --> 00:24:22.160
So this is actually a more convenient way to travel from city to city rather than having

00:24:22.160 --> 00:24:23.160
to take a flight.

00:24:23.160 --> 00:24:30.160
And because I did not, I don't know why, but I, at the time I didn't trust Annie to like

00:24:30.160 --> 00:24:31.160
keep these safe.

00:24:31.160 --> 00:24:32.160
I thought she would like lose them.

00:24:32.160 --> 00:24:36.160
She just thinks that I'm this idiot and you know, can't do anything.

00:24:36.160 --> 00:24:43.160
So the whole time I keep these rail passes from like, you know, the States all the way

00:24:43.160 --> 00:24:44.160
to this last stop.

00:24:44.160 --> 00:24:49.160
We were like in Osaka ready to head back to Tokyo to like catch our flight.

00:24:49.160 --> 00:24:52.160
And Frank was like, Annie, give me the rail passes.

00:24:52.160 --> 00:24:57.160
Like, I don't trust you to, you know, carry us to like the end of the trip with these rail

00:24:57.160 --> 00:24:58.160
passes.

00:24:58.160 --> 00:24:59.160
I'm like, I'm fine.

00:24:59.160 --> 00:25:00.160
I'm fine.

00:25:00.160 --> 00:25:01.160
And he's like, no, I insist.

00:25:01.160 --> 00:25:05.160
So I give him the rail passes in the train station.

00:25:05.160 --> 00:25:09.160
And then we go get food, like literally under 20 minutes.

00:25:09.160 --> 00:25:12.160
We are about to go into the train station.

00:25:12.160 --> 00:25:17.160
And I asked Frank for the rail passes and he's like, I don't know where they are.

00:25:17.160 --> 00:25:24.160
And so he was just wearing this large sweatshirt and he just puts the rail passes like right

00:25:24.160 --> 00:25:25.160
in his pocket.

00:25:25.160 --> 00:25:30.160
And it was like, went in from one end and went out from the other while he was buying

00:25:30.160 --> 00:25:31.160
food.

00:25:31.160 --> 00:25:32.160
Yeah.

00:25:32.160 --> 00:25:34.160
So what happened is they basically slipped out.

00:25:34.160 --> 00:25:38.160
Luckily people in Japan are very nice and we were able to find them really quickly.

00:25:38.160 --> 00:25:40.160
Like in five minutes or so.

00:25:40.160 --> 00:25:46.160
So like when Frank realized I was gone, I just like frantically starts to like look all over

00:25:46.160 --> 00:25:47.160
the place.

00:25:47.160 --> 00:25:51.160
I saw one like, you know, 20 feet over there.

00:25:51.160 --> 00:25:54.160
So I run over, I grab it and like, we cannot find the other one.

00:25:54.160 --> 00:25:56.160
So I'm like going crazy.

00:25:56.160 --> 00:26:01.160
And then I go to, I think I go to like the train person.

00:26:01.160 --> 00:26:03.160
I'm like, oh, we lost a rail pass.

00:26:03.160 --> 00:26:07.160
And then this really nice American couple was like, oh, are you looking for a rail pass?

00:26:07.160 --> 00:26:08.160
Like we found one.

00:26:08.160 --> 00:26:10.160
We gave it to like the officer.

00:26:10.160 --> 00:26:12.160
And like, that's when we found the other one.

00:26:12.160 --> 00:26:15.160
But like ever since that time.

00:26:15.160 --> 00:26:16.160
Okay.

00:26:16.160 --> 00:26:17.160
Okay.

00:26:17.160 --> 00:26:18.160
I mean, I'm sure.

00:26:18.160 --> 00:26:22.160
So like many examples of like when we go to Costco and you have to give their receipt

00:26:22.160 --> 00:26:24.160
for you to check off.

00:26:24.160 --> 00:26:26.160
And she'll be like, where's the receipt?

00:26:26.160 --> 00:26:27.160
I gave it to you.

00:26:27.160 --> 00:26:28.160
I'd be like, no, you didn't.

00:26:28.160 --> 00:26:29.160
Yeah.

00:26:29.160 --> 00:26:30.160
She's like, yes, I did.

00:26:30.160 --> 00:26:31.160
Give me the receipt.

00:26:31.160 --> 00:26:32.160
I gave it to you.

00:26:32.160 --> 00:26:34.160
I'm like, and you did not give me this receipt.

00:26:34.160 --> 00:26:35.160
I don't know what you're talking about.

00:26:35.160 --> 00:26:36.160
Like check your pockets.

00:26:36.160 --> 00:26:38.160
And she's like, no, like I gave it to you.

00:26:38.160 --> 00:26:39.160
And then I like check in her pocket.

00:26:39.160 --> 00:26:40.160
I pull it out.

00:26:40.160 --> 00:26:41.160
And she's like, oh, okay.

00:26:41.160 --> 00:26:43.160
And this has happened multiple times.

00:26:43.160 --> 00:26:44.160
It's not.

00:26:44.160 --> 00:26:45.160
I don't know why.

00:26:45.160 --> 00:26:47.160
Every time she thinks she gave me the receipt.

00:26:47.160 --> 00:26:51.160
So like stuff like that made me think like, oh, she can't be trusted with the thing.

00:26:51.160 --> 00:26:52.160
Yeah.

00:26:52.160 --> 00:26:53.160
But like in general, she can.

00:26:53.160 --> 00:26:56.160
And like, obviously I cannot be trusted.

00:26:56.160 --> 00:26:57.160
Yeah.

00:26:57.160 --> 00:26:59.160
We have many, many more examples.

00:26:59.160 --> 00:27:02.160
Like two, I can think like off the top of my head.

00:27:02.160 --> 00:27:04.160
And we're just going to kind of go off on a tangent.

00:27:04.160 --> 00:27:09.160
One time Frank was like booking a flight to visit me.

00:27:10.160 --> 00:27:14.160
I won't say the location, but basically he books the wrong dates.

00:27:14.160 --> 00:27:18.160
So like it was supposed to be like, let's say August 10th to the 20th.

00:27:18.160 --> 00:27:21.160
He books it for like August 21st to the 30th.

00:27:21.160 --> 00:27:23.160
And so I can't.

00:27:23.160 --> 00:27:27.160
Oh, so right after he books it, he was like, why did I get the wrong confirmation?

00:27:27.160 --> 00:27:30.160
I'm like, you probably booked for the wrong date.

00:27:30.160 --> 00:27:35.160
So then I have to go and call the airline and then fix it because he hates customers.

00:27:35.160 --> 00:27:37.160
He hates talking to customer service.

00:27:37.160 --> 00:27:39.160
And then the other time.

00:27:39.160 --> 00:27:42.160
Oh, yeah.

00:27:42.160 --> 00:27:47.160
So he decided to treat me to a play while we were in New York.

00:27:47.160 --> 00:27:48.160
Hamilton.

00:27:48.160 --> 00:27:49.160
No, it was Book of Mormon.

00:27:49.160 --> 00:27:50.160
Book of Mormon.

00:27:50.160 --> 00:27:51.160
Yeah.

00:27:51.160 --> 00:27:54.160
And he books it for the Tuesday after we leave New York.

00:27:54.160 --> 00:27:57.160
And there are like no refunds or something.

00:27:57.160 --> 00:28:05.160
And I had to be on the phone for literally two hours trying to change these tickets because he made the wrong choice.

00:28:06.160 --> 00:28:09.160
I have this really bad habit where I guess I don't double check my work.

00:28:09.160 --> 00:28:12.160
I just kind of assume I got it right on the first time.

00:28:12.160 --> 00:28:16.160
Oh, so this kind of goes back to like our school days and test taking.

00:28:16.160 --> 00:28:18.160
So I would always do really well on tests.

00:28:18.160 --> 00:28:23.160
And I very rarely double check my work because I just think like, oh, I just got this right.

00:28:23.160 --> 00:28:24.160
Yeah.

00:28:24.160 --> 00:28:25.160
Annie was very meticulous.

00:28:25.160 --> 00:28:28.160
No, I did terrible in tests.

00:28:28.160 --> 00:28:31.160
And it was usually because I read the question wrong.

00:28:31.160 --> 00:28:32.160
And like, that's kind of what I learned.

00:28:32.160 --> 00:28:39.160
Like, so as an adult, I'm like, if I had just rewrite the question like a couple of times, I would have gotten it right.

00:28:39.160 --> 00:28:46.160
So now whenever I do like important things, I will make sure that I triple check my work.

00:28:46.160 --> 00:28:51.160
So that's why I'm still like not very detail oriented in like everyday stuff.

00:28:51.160 --> 00:28:52.160
Like I lose the Costco receipts.

00:28:52.160 --> 00:29:01.160
But if it's important, like booking a flight or, you know, booking tickets where it's like actual money involved, I always double check.

00:29:01.160 --> 00:29:02.160
Yeah.

00:29:02.160 --> 00:29:13.160
But like in general, our Japan trip went very smoothly outside of that rail pass thing and the like lack of money, which like didn't really affect us at all.

00:29:13.160 --> 00:29:14.160
Yeah.

00:29:14.160 --> 00:29:22.160
Like in hindsight, it was pretty fun because it was good because we only spent less than $3,000 on both of us.

00:29:22.160 --> 00:29:23.160
For two weeks.

00:29:23.160 --> 00:29:24.160
For two weeks.

00:29:24.160 --> 00:29:24.160
Yeah.

00:29:24.160 --> 00:29:25.160
So really good deal.

00:29:25.160 --> 00:29:27.160
And was that including the housing and stuff?

00:29:27.160 --> 00:29:28.160
Yeah, it was including everything.

00:29:28.160 --> 00:29:29.160
Yeah.

00:29:29.160 --> 00:29:30.160
Yeah.

00:29:30.160 --> 00:29:31.160
So it was an extremely cheap vacation.

00:29:31.160 --> 00:29:32.160
We still had a ton of fun.

00:29:32.160 --> 00:29:34.160
We had a bunch of pictures.

00:29:34.160 --> 00:29:38.160
Oh, you're really sad about missing like the cherry blossom season, right?

00:29:38.160 --> 00:29:39.160
Oh yeah.

00:29:39.160 --> 00:29:40.160
Like cherry blossom.

00:29:40.160 --> 00:29:43.160
I guess like it just happens earlier and earlier every year now.

00:29:43.160 --> 00:29:50.160
Like it used to be like you can go at the beginning of April and you'll catch those cherry blossoms, but it actually bloomed like a couple of weeks earlier that year.

00:29:50.160 --> 00:29:51.160
Yeah.

00:29:51.160 --> 00:29:54.160
And I thought it was still fine, but it wasn't like full bloom.

00:29:54.160 --> 00:29:56.160
It was like starting to decline.

00:29:56.160 --> 00:29:57.160
So it wasn't like peak.

00:29:57.160 --> 00:29:58.160
Yeah.

00:29:58.160 --> 00:29:59.160
I thought it was fine.

00:29:59.160 --> 00:30:11.160
I mean, in my like, in my opinion, like if we are already paying, I guess, top price for, you know, going during Sakura season, I want to see like the foam blossom.

00:30:11.160 --> 00:30:12.160
Yeah.

00:30:12.160 --> 00:30:13.160
Yeah.

00:30:13.160 --> 00:30:14.160
That makes sense.

00:30:14.160 --> 00:30:15.160
Yeah.

00:30:15.160 --> 00:30:16.160
Like I guess other highlights of the Japan trip.

00:30:16.160 --> 00:30:18.160
We went to a couple like Pokemon centers.

00:30:18.160 --> 00:30:24.160
We went to Akihabara, which is like the Japanese Mecca for nerdy type stuff.

00:30:24.160 --> 00:30:29.160
Um, we were in Tokyo for several days, but I don't really remember much from our time there.

00:30:29.160 --> 00:30:32.160
It was Saka and Kyoto, which were both more like historical.

00:30:32.160 --> 00:30:36.160
There were like temples and stuff there, which I thought was actually kind of boring.

00:30:36.160 --> 00:30:44.160
But like, I was also kind of stressed because I was also trying to study for interviews at that time.

00:30:44.160 --> 00:30:49.160
Um, so that was like a slight damper on the vacation, but it wasn't too bad.

00:30:49.160 --> 00:30:53.160
I was studying maybe like an hour or two or try to every day.

00:30:53.160 --> 00:30:54.160
Yeah.

00:30:54.160 --> 00:30:56.160
I think you were just like in general, more stressed.

00:30:56.160 --> 00:31:01.160
Cause I think you were unhappy at your job at the time he was at credit karma.

00:31:01.160 --> 00:31:06.160
And that was also when like the crypto thing started blowing up.

00:31:06.160 --> 00:31:13.160
And so you were basically debating, like if you should like go to another job or, you know,

00:31:13.160 --> 00:31:19.160
do your own thing, but you were in general, like unhappy because credit karma wasn't like,

00:31:19.160 --> 00:31:22.160
wasn't clear on if they're giving you a promotion.

00:31:22.160 --> 00:31:25.160
Like they were basically kind of dragging their feet on everything.

00:31:25.160 --> 00:31:25.160
Yeah.

00:31:25.160 --> 00:31:29.160
So they ended up giving me a pretty substantial raise, like a 15% raise.

00:31:29.160 --> 00:31:35.160
Uh, but even with the raise, I was able to get more money at my next job because you just,

00:31:35.160 --> 00:31:38.160
it's really hard to match market rate for software engineers.

00:31:38.160 --> 00:31:44.160
Um, but I mean, I really liked my team, um, my director and the rest of the guys,

00:31:44.160 --> 00:31:47.160
they have like a going away dinner or lunch or something for me.

00:31:47.160 --> 00:31:52.160
Um, and then they like went all the way up to like the CTO to like approve.

00:31:52.160 --> 00:31:55.160
Giving me more money to get me to stay.

00:31:55.160 --> 00:31:59.160
But eventually the CTO said no and said like, Oh, you know, there's people leaving all the time.

00:31:59.160 --> 00:32:03.160
Like if we make an exception for Frank, we're going to have to start making it for lots of people.

00:32:03.160 --> 00:32:09.160
Um, that same CTO was later found out to be reading our private Slack messages.

00:32:09.160 --> 00:32:14.160
So like in Slack as an admin, you're able to read all of your employee Slack messages.

00:32:14.160 --> 00:32:15.160
Like they're not private.

00:32:15.160 --> 00:32:16.160
Really?

00:32:16.160 --> 00:32:21.160
If you're writing sketchy things, you should be worried because that's not private.

00:32:21.160 --> 00:32:25.160
And so what ended up happening is this news came out that he was reading these messages.

00:32:25.160 --> 00:32:30.160
And a glass door review came out being like, yeah, our CTO is super sketchy.

00:32:30.160 --> 00:32:33.160
He's been reading my private messages and other employees.

00:32:33.160 --> 00:32:35.160
And he basically couldn't refute it.

00:32:35.160 --> 00:32:39.160
And they're like, you know, they responded with like, Oh, the employer responded with blah, blah, blah.

00:32:39.160 --> 00:32:41.160
And everyone's like, he didn't say he didn't do that.

00:32:41.160 --> 00:32:42.160
Like he did do that.

00:32:42.160 --> 00:32:43.160
Like he did do that.

00:32:43.160 --> 00:32:47.160
Uh, and then of course the other half of the people being like, Oh, you didn't know about this already.

00:32:47.160 --> 00:32:54.160
Uh, but yeah, I obviously have a pretty bad impression of that guy because I would have stayed, uh, had they given me the compensation bump.

00:32:54.160 --> 00:32:57.160
Um, and like, I liked my team at the time a lot.

00:32:57.160 --> 00:32:59.160
I thought my job was pretty good.

00:32:59.160 --> 00:33:02.160
Uh, I mean, everything about credit karma was like pretty decent.

00:33:02.160 --> 00:33:03.160
Yeah.

00:33:03.160 --> 00:33:06.160
They will have all these like nice events that you took me to.

00:33:06.160 --> 00:33:07.160
Yeah.

00:33:07.160 --> 00:33:08.160
They had a bunch of events.

00:33:08.160 --> 00:33:10.160
It was definitely a startup life.

00:33:10.160 --> 00:33:20.160
Um, yeah, I guess going back to the end of the vacation, we kind of go back home without any issues.

00:33:20.160 --> 00:33:25.160
And eventually I do end up deciding to start a crypto startup.

00:33:25.160 --> 00:33:27.160
So this is in like 2017.

00:33:27.160 --> 00:33:29.160
I leave my credit karma job.

00:33:29.160 --> 00:33:31.160
I was evaluating several different ideas.

00:33:31.160 --> 00:33:39.160
So it was either like AI machine learning type deal, um, AR VR or blockchain.

00:33:39.160 --> 00:33:43.160
And basically decided like blockchain had the most potential.

00:33:43.160 --> 00:33:46.160
Uh, eventually that startup kind of fails.

00:33:46.160 --> 00:33:51.160
And I'm forced to get another job, which ends up being Grubhub in Chicago.

00:33:51.160 --> 00:33:53.160
At that point, we're kind of looking to buy a house.

00:33:53.160 --> 00:33:54.160
Yeah.

00:33:54.160 --> 00:34:06.160
So I think the conversation went like we were looking for somewhere that, you know, paid just as much as San Francisco, but also had a cheaper cost of living.

00:34:06.160 --> 00:34:16.160
And we were evaluating like Seattle, Chicago, and you basically asked me like, Hey, if we were going to move somewhere, where would you go?

00:34:16.160 --> 00:34:19.160
Um, and I said, it could be Seattle, Chicago.

00:34:19.160 --> 00:34:22.160
And like, I think there was another like Austin, Texas or something.

00:34:22.160 --> 00:34:25.160
No, I didn't want to go there, but maybe you put it on there.

00:34:25.160 --> 00:34:35.160
But anyways, um, and then we chose Chicago just because, you know, I, I had been to Chicago before and I thought it reminded me a lot of like Toronto.

00:34:35.160 --> 00:34:40.160
A lot of people say that, um, and so that's where we decided to go.

00:34:40.160 --> 00:34:42.160
And then we almost broke up before going there.

00:34:42.160 --> 00:34:43.160
Oh yeah.

00:34:43.160 --> 00:34:46.160
It's like, it's not an easy decision for me.

00:34:46.160 --> 00:34:55.160
Like, as you know, to like to you, it seems like a really simple decision, but he was also like, Hey, you know, you don't have to work anymore.

00:34:55.160 --> 00:34:57.160
You can just like come hang out with me in Chicago.

00:34:57.160 --> 00:35:00.160
I'm going to be making plenty of money for the both of us.

00:35:00.160 --> 00:35:07.160
And for me, I just like, I just moved to San Francisco for my job.

00:35:07.160 --> 00:35:16.160
And for me to just like uproot myself, go to Chicago with this random guy that I'm dating, not have a job lined up.

00:35:16.160 --> 00:35:17.160
Like, what if we break up?

00:35:17.160 --> 00:35:18.160
And then what do I do?

00:35:18.160 --> 00:35:20.160
Like, do I go back, find another job?

00:35:20.160 --> 00:35:21.160
Like, do I find a job in Chicago?

00:35:21.160 --> 00:35:23.160
Do I go back to San Francisco?

00:35:23.160 --> 00:35:25.160
It's just gonna like mess everything up.

00:35:25.160 --> 00:35:36.160
So I was having a really tough time like deciding, even though I contributed in like the, you know, plan of moving to Chicago in the first place.

00:35:36.160 --> 00:35:41.160
But it was just like really hard for me to decide when it actually came about.

00:35:41.160 --> 00:35:42.160
Yeah.

00:35:42.160 --> 00:35:46.160
And I think one of your major worries at the time was you didn't want to find another job.

00:35:46.160 --> 00:35:49.160
Like you're really against like interviewing and looking for another job.

00:35:49.160 --> 00:35:54.160
And then eventually ended up working out because her job allowed her to work remote in Chicago.

00:35:54.160 --> 00:35:55.160
Yeah, that's true.

00:35:55.160 --> 00:35:56.160
Yeah.

00:35:56.160 --> 00:35:59.160
And at that point we hadn't gotten engaged yet.

00:35:59.160 --> 00:36:01.160
Like we got engaged while I was in Chicago.

00:36:01.160 --> 00:36:08.160
But basically the Chicago job ended up turning out really well because the stock exploded to all time highs.

00:36:08.160 --> 00:36:11.160
My stock compensation package like forexed.

00:36:11.160 --> 00:36:17.160
And so like I think my total compensation when I first joined was only going to be 200k per year.

00:36:17.160 --> 00:36:22.160
But then it actually ended up being over 300k because of how high the stock went up.

00:36:22.160 --> 00:36:24.160
And so we had all this money.

00:36:24.160 --> 00:36:27.160
Our place in Chicago was like decent.

00:36:27.160 --> 00:36:28.160
We got it for pretty cheap.

00:36:28.160 --> 00:36:31.160
It was like 1850 came with a parking spot.

00:36:31.160 --> 00:36:34.160
We had two grocery stores right next to us.

00:36:34.160 --> 00:36:39.160
And I think I started to gain some weight there because there was like a bunch of pizza and donuts and just.

00:36:39.160 --> 00:36:40.160
Yeah.

00:36:40.160 --> 00:36:47.160
And you had already gained a bunch of weight because like basically Frank went home for a week before his job started.

00:36:47.160 --> 00:36:50.160
He gained like 10 pounds while he was home.

00:36:50.160 --> 00:36:51.160
Yeah.

00:36:51.160 --> 00:36:53.160
And so and we were.

00:36:53.160 --> 00:36:55.160
Oh, and then your family visited you in SF.

00:36:55.160 --> 00:36:56.160
Yeah.

00:36:56.160 --> 00:37:00.160
So because we were leaving SF, I invited my family down for a trip.

00:37:00.160 --> 00:37:04.160
Like basically my whole family came down.

00:37:04.160 --> 00:37:08.160
And we stayed there for like seven days or something.

00:37:08.160 --> 00:37:14.160
And because Frank's Grubhub had this like $10,000 stipend for a moving fee.

00:37:14.160 --> 00:37:15.160
Yeah.

00:37:15.160 --> 00:37:22.160
He basically just paid for all of our food and hotel like everything like for my family to come visit San Francisco.

00:37:22.160 --> 00:37:23.160
Oh, yeah.

00:37:23.160 --> 00:37:26.160
Like and you went home to live for like a whole week.

00:37:26.160 --> 00:37:28.160
So it ended up working out pretty well.

00:37:28.160 --> 00:37:33.160
And that one week, all I did was play video games and like eat food for an entire week.

00:37:33.160 --> 00:37:34.160
Yeah.

00:37:34.160 --> 00:37:39.160
I didn't even move outside of my house or my parents house for that entire week.

00:37:39.160 --> 00:37:40.160
So it was pretty good.

00:37:40.160 --> 00:37:43.160
So yeah, now we're in Chicago.

00:37:43.160 --> 00:37:45.160
Things are getting more serious.

00:37:45.160 --> 00:37:47.160
We get engaged.

00:37:47.160 --> 00:37:52.160
Well, before we get engaged, we actually had like a really bad fight.

00:37:52.160 --> 00:37:54.160
Oh, we did have a really bad fight.

00:37:54.160 --> 00:37:55.160
Yeah.

00:37:55.160 --> 00:37:56.160
What was it about though?

00:37:56.160 --> 00:37:58.160
I don't remember what it was about.

00:37:58.160 --> 00:38:02.160
But you know, knowing Frank, it's never about anything.

00:38:02.160 --> 00:38:07.160
But like, but it's Frank has like a lot of pride.

00:38:07.160 --> 00:38:11.160
So whenever you fight him, like even if he's wrong, he's right.

00:38:11.160 --> 00:38:14.160
So I always have to be the one apologizing.

00:38:14.160 --> 00:38:16.160
And like, I don't know what we were fighting about.

00:38:16.160 --> 00:38:20.160
But basically, it came down to we're very mad at each other.

00:38:20.160 --> 00:38:23.160
And I asked Frank, like, should I move out?

00:38:23.160 --> 00:38:27.160
Like, it's so bad that like, I think it's just not worth it.

00:38:27.160 --> 00:38:31.160
Maybe I should just find another place by myself.

00:38:31.160 --> 00:38:34.160
Chill for a couple months and like kind of reevaluate.

00:38:34.160 --> 00:38:38.160
And you were like, yeah, I think that's a good idea.

00:38:38.160 --> 00:38:44.160
And then I like, I was like, no, I don't want to do that.

00:38:44.160 --> 00:38:47.160
I was like, no.

00:38:47.160 --> 00:38:51.160
And then the next day, I went to visit him at work.

00:38:51.160 --> 00:38:53.160
And like, I guess we resolved it that night.

00:38:53.160 --> 00:39:00.160
And then the next day, he was like, do you want a diamond or like a lab diamond or a moisenite?

00:39:00.160 --> 00:39:04.160
And so that's kind of when I was like, oh, yeah.

00:39:04.160 --> 00:39:07.160
Like in my mind, I'm like an all or nothing type of guy.

00:39:07.160 --> 00:39:16.160
So at that point, I was thinking like, okay, we're either breaking up immediately, like in the very near future, or we have to get married, which is probably like not the right way to think about it.

00:39:16.160 --> 00:39:17.160
But that's how my mind works.

00:39:17.160 --> 00:39:22.160
Like I go for, basically, I'm like all in, I'm either all in or I'm all out.

00:39:22.160 --> 00:39:28.160
So like with Annie at that point, I basically made the decision that I am all in and I'm going to marry her.

00:39:28.160 --> 00:39:31.160
And like, Annie's more of a romantic.

00:39:31.160 --> 00:39:37.160
So she would have preferred if I did all of this in like secret and like did like a surprise engagement or something.

00:39:37.160 --> 00:39:38.160
But I'm a bit more practical.

00:39:38.160 --> 00:39:40.160
So I wanted to know like, like, what diamond do you want?

00:39:40.160 --> 00:39:46.160
Because if it was up to me, I would have just gotten like a fake moisenite or even something cheaper that looks like a diamond.

00:39:46.160 --> 00:39:49.160
But then Annie's like, oh, no, I want a real diamond.

00:39:49.160 --> 00:39:53.160
And then she like said, like, I want this cut, et cetera, et cetera.

00:39:53.160 --> 00:39:54.160
Yeah.

00:39:54.160 --> 00:39:59.160
So we actually like kind of went through the process together of, you know, selecting the rain.

00:39:59.160 --> 00:40:02.160
And we actually got it from a really good jeweler.

00:40:02.160 --> 00:40:07.160
Well, it's not really a jeweler, but like they have pretty good deals on their diamonds.

00:40:07.160 --> 00:40:15.160
And so we were able to select a diamond for a much cheaper price and it would have been like if we went to like a branded place.

00:40:15.160 --> 00:40:21.160
Yeah. So basically I found this tool online that would give you the best price to performance ratio.

00:40:21.160 --> 00:40:25.160
So our budget at that time, we didn't actually have a ton of money.

00:40:25.160 --> 00:40:30.160
I think I only had like 10 or 15 K in cash total in my checking account.

00:40:30.160 --> 00:40:33.160
And so like most of my money was tied up in other stuff.

00:40:33.160 --> 00:40:38.160
And so at that point, my budget was like 10 K because I'm like, oh, I don't want to spend all of my money.

00:40:38.160 --> 00:40:42.160
But then the like best price to performance ratio was like 13 K.

00:40:42.160 --> 00:40:45.160
So I'm like, oh, well, I got to get this one now because like the value quote unquote.

00:40:45.160 --> 00:40:47.160
Yeah. Because Frank is all about the value.

00:40:47.160 --> 00:40:48.160
Yeah.

00:40:48.160 --> 00:40:56.160
And then, I mean, basically we get engaged in the engagement story is like that also didn't go correctly.

00:40:56.160 --> 00:41:01.160
Because like basically what ended up happening is I was trying to send her this like surprise video.

00:41:01.160 --> 00:41:05.160
And basically it's like a picture book of a bunch of our photos together.

00:41:05.160 --> 00:41:14.160
So the jeweler actually sent you a prompt to create one of these like online like picture books or like memory books.

00:41:14.160 --> 00:41:18.160
And so basically I make it, I send it to Annie.

00:41:18.160 --> 00:41:20.160
I'm like ready to propose that night.

00:41:20.160 --> 00:41:20.160
Yeah.

00:41:20.160 --> 00:41:22.160
And she like can't get it to work.

00:41:22.160 --> 00:41:28.160
Okay. So I was cleaning like I just had like finished cooking and I was cleaning the kitchen.

00:41:28.160 --> 00:41:30.160
And Frank was like, hey, I just sent you something.

00:41:30.160 --> 00:41:32.160
Do you want to check your email?

00:41:32.160 --> 00:41:34.160
I was like, wait, wait, wait, I'm busy.

00:41:34.160 --> 00:41:36.160
Like, and then so I continued to clean.

00:41:36.160 --> 00:41:40.160
And then in 30 minutes, he was like, hey, can you check your email, please?

00:41:40.160 --> 00:41:43.160
And I'm like, no, no, I'm busy.

00:41:43.160 --> 00:41:47.160
And then he just got like kind of like frustrated.

00:41:47.160 --> 00:41:49.160
I was just like, hey, it's really important.

00:41:49.160 --> 00:41:50.160
Like check your email.

00:41:50.160 --> 00:41:52.160
And then so I was like, oh, okay, fine.

00:41:52.160 --> 00:41:56.160
And then I go open my computer and then my computer crashes.

00:41:56.160 --> 00:41:58.160
And that is not what happened.

00:41:58.160 --> 00:42:03.160
So basically she could not open the email, get it to work for the life of her.

00:42:03.160 --> 00:42:06.160
I'm just thinking like, why can she not do the simple thing?

00:42:06.160 --> 00:42:07.160
He was like, God damn it.

00:42:07.160 --> 00:42:09.160
I have to fix your computer now.

00:42:09.160 --> 00:42:17.160
And then so he takes over the computer and just like frantically like gets it to work.

00:42:17.160 --> 00:42:19.160
And then he passes it back to me.

00:42:19.160 --> 00:42:21.160
But at that point I'm like, okay, I'm not interested.

00:42:21.160 --> 00:42:23.160
The moment is ruined.

00:42:23.160 --> 00:42:24.160
The moment is ruined.

00:42:24.160 --> 00:42:26.160
This is definitely not happening tonight.

00:42:26.160 --> 00:42:31.160
But then I'm thinking like after all that and like we go to sleep, I kind of like calm down.

00:42:31.160 --> 00:42:32.160
No, no, no.

00:42:32.160 --> 00:42:34.160
So but that night I like open it.

00:42:34.160 --> 00:42:39.160
Like once you fixed it, I open it and then I see this like picture book or whatever.

00:42:39.160 --> 00:42:41.160
I'm like, oh, are you going to propose?

00:42:41.160 --> 00:42:43.160
And then he's like, not anymore.

00:42:43.160 --> 00:42:45.160
He just leaves.

00:42:45.160 --> 00:42:47.160
I don't leave because we live together.

00:42:47.160 --> 00:42:48.160
Yeah.

00:42:48.160 --> 00:42:50.160
I just like goes to the other room.

00:42:50.160 --> 00:42:57.160
And so that during that night, as Annie is sleeping, I slip on the ring while she's sleeping.

00:42:57.160 --> 00:43:02.160
And then my idea is like, oh, yeah, I'll like propose in the morning when she wakes up.

00:43:02.160 --> 00:43:05.160
And then she wakes up and she sees like the ring on her finger.

00:43:05.160 --> 00:43:08.160
Yeah, I was like, it feels like something's on my finger.

00:43:08.160 --> 00:43:14.160
And obviously, I kind of knew just because, you know, we had that talk last night.

00:43:14.160 --> 00:43:16.160
So I was like, I feel like something's on my finger.

00:43:16.160 --> 00:43:19.160
And I look and like, you know, I had a ring on it.

00:43:19.160 --> 00:43:22.160
And then I was kind of just like, what?

00:43:22.160 --> 00:43:24.160
Like, you didn't even propose.

00:43:24.160 --> 00:43:29.160
And then Frank is like, and I'm like, you have to propose to me.

00:43:29.160 --> 00:43:30.160
He's like, no.

00:43:30.160 --> 00:43:32.160
I'm like, babe.

00:43:33.160 --> 00:43:34.160
He's like, I refuse.

00:43:34.160 --> 00:43:35.160
It's already on.

00:43:35.160 --> 00:43:36.160
It's already done.

00:43:40.160 --> 00:43:43.160
And like, so I basically like, I got upset.

00:43:43.160 --> 00:43:45.160
I forced him to like propose to me.

00:43:45.160 --> 00:43:46.160
I was like, fine.

00:43:46.160 --> 00:43:47.160
Well, you marry me.

00:43:49.160 --> 00:43:51.160
Yeah, it wasn't my best moment for sure.

00:43:51.160 --> 00:43:58.160
And so I had like other ideas like renting out a movie theater or like getting a drone and like having that.

00:43:58.160 --> 00:44:00.160
But then I saw something like a guy tried to do that.

00:44:00.160 --> 00:44:02.160
And then the drone actually dropped the ring.

00:44:02.160 --> 00:44:03.160
Yeah, they like lost it.

00:44:03.160 --> 00:44:09.160
And like the movie theater thing wasn't as easy as I thought it would be because it's like you can't just easily rent out a movie.

00:44:09.160 --> 00:44:14.160
Yeah, you probably have to buy like every single ticket there or something.

00:44:14.160 --> 00:44:15.160
Yeah.

00:44:15.160 --> 00:44:17.160
But he was telling me all these ideas.

00:44:17.160 --> 00:44:19.160
I'm like, that would have been really nice.

00:44:20.160 --> 00:44:22.160
That would have also been very nice.

00:44:23.160 --> 00:44:24.160
Yes.

00:44:24.160 --> 00:44:26.160
I mean, at that point, we're engaged.

00:44:26.160 --> 00:44:28.160
We start planning the wedding.

00:44:29.160 --> 00:44:32.160
Mostly Annie's like doing essentially all of it herself.

00:44:32.160 --> 00:44:34.160
I'm just like, she'll ever so often ask for my opinion.

00:44:34.160 --> 00:44:35.160
I'll just be like, yep, that looks good.

00:44:35.160 --> 00:44:36.160
That looks good.

00:44:36.160 --> 00:44:37.160
That looks good.

00:44:37.160 --> 00:44:48.160
Like in my mind, I'm like, I just wanted us to like go sign some papers and like do like a really, really small wedding with maybe like our families and maybe like a couple close friends.

00:44:48.160 --> 00:44:55.160
Even at like the last moment, like Frank was still like, I don't want to have this wedding.

00:44:55.160 --> 00:44:57.160
Like this is not what I want.

00:44:57.160 --> 00:44:58.160
Yeah.

00:44:58.160 --> 00:44:59.160
Yeah.

00:44:59.160 --> 00:45:05.160
And I had also read something that said that like the more extravagant your wedding, the less likely it is for your marriage to work out.

00:45:05.160 --> 00:45:08.160
But this is kind of like the actual wedding itself was great.

00:45:08.160 --> 00:45:14.160
Like I thought it was definitely worth it, especially because Annie planned so much of it herself.

00:45:14.160 --> 00:45:16.160
We actually saved probably over like $10,000.

00:45:17.160 --> 00:45:21.160
We actually did sign our official wedding registry papers in Chicago.

00:45:21.160 --> 00:45:24.160
So I don't remember exactly when we did that.

00:45:24.160 --> 00:45:26.160
We did it on 420.

00:45:26.160 --> 00:45:34.160
But basically, the idea was that like, oh, if we get this process started sooner, we can start getting Annie's green card sooner.

00:45:34.160 --> 00:45:39.160
And like at that point, like in my mind, we're like basically married already.

00:45:39.160 --> 00:45:42.160
And so we thought like, okay, might as well make it official.

00:45:42.160 --> 00:45:45.160
And yeah, that was just like the two of us.

00:45:45.160 --> 00:45:51.160
We went in, got it signed, got it officiated by this like the random dude who does that paperwork.

00:45:51.160 --> 00:45:52.160
Yeah.

00:45:52.160 --> 00:45:53.160
Yeah.

00:45:53.160 --> 00:45:58.160
And you don't need a, you don't need a witness if you're getting married in Chicago.

00:45:58.160 --> 00:45:59.160
So.

00:45:59.160 --> 00:46:02.160
Oh, and I think at this point, I don't remember at what point we started to get more wealthy.

00:46:02.160 --> 00:46:07.160
Maybe even started off in the Bay Area, but we started checking out more and more Michelin stars.

00:46:07.160 --> 00:46:12.160
And I basically realized that I hate going to Michelin restaurants.

00:46:12.160 --> 00:46:13.160
Yeah.

00:46:13.160 --> 00:46:13.160
Okay.

00:46:13.160 --> 00:46:19.160
So we actually started going to Michelin stars in Chicago just because like the cost of living is so low in Chicago.

00:46:19.160 --> 00:46:23.160
And like Frank was making quite a bit of money.

00:46:23.160 --> 00:46:25.160
Like I was always making like no amounts of money.

00:46:25.160 --> 00:46:28.160
So, you know, let's just pretend I don't make any money at all.

00:46:28.160 --> 00:46:37.160
And so basically we had enough money to spend on like anything we wanted.

00:46:37.160 --> 00:46:42.160
But we were not the type of people to like buy luxury bags or like luxury cars.

00:46:42.160 --> 00:46:44.160
Like we, we don't spend on that type of stuff.

00:46:44.160 --> 00:46:50.160
We also lived in a decently cheap apartment, which was only like $1,800 a month.

00:46:50.160 --> 00:46:52.160
So we spent all of our money on food.

00:46:52.160 --> 00:46:56.160
Like we don't look at prices when we go grocery shopping.

00:46:56.160 --> 00:47:01.160
We don't look at prices when we go eating at restaurants, which is really nice.

00:47:01.160 --> 00:47:12.160
So we've probably been to like three or four or even more Michelin stars in like specifically in Chicago.

00:47:12.160 --> 00:47:13.160
In Chicago, we went to like three or four.

00:47:13.160 --> 00:47:14.160
Yeah.

00:47:14.160 --> 00:47:16.160
And then later on when we went to the Bay Area, we went to a bunch more.

00:47:16.160 --> 00:47:25.160
But like, yeah, in my opinion, it's just not worth it because going to a Michelin star restaurant, like if you think about the quality of food, it can only get so much better.

00:47:25.160 --> 00:47:28.160
So it's like a logarithmic scale for how much better it tastes.

00:47:28.160 --> 00:47:33.160
And so they start to like add to the quote unquote experience in all these other ways.

00:47:33.160 --> 00:47:35.160
So we went to a three star, like Acadia.

00:47:35.160 --> 00:47:36.160
We went to Alinea.

00:47:36.160 --> 00:47:37.160
Alinea.

00:47:37.160 --> 00:47:38.160
Yeah.

00:47:38.160 --> 00:47:45.160
And so what they do is they basically have all this food that looks really interesting, but doesn't taste that much better.

00:47:45.160 --> 00:47:46.160
Yeah.

00:47:46.160 --> 00:47:49.160
It's, it's all about the experience and tricking your mind.

00:47:49.160 --> 00:47:58.160
So, um, for example, they came up with a jar of what looked like vanilla beans, like fresh vanilla beans.

00:47:58.160 --> 00:48:00.160
So I was like, oh, it's a vanilla bean.

00:48:00.160 --> 00:48:10.160
And then Frank was like, it looks like a dehydrated, like green bean, but it actually was a vanilla flavored beef jerky that was made to look like a vanilla bean.

00:48:10.160 --> 00:48:17.160
And they also have tomato purees, um, put into like a mold that looks like a strawberry.

00:48:17.160 --> 00:48:20.160
So you think you're eating a strawberry, but it's tomato flavored.

00:48:20.160 --> 00:48:23.160
So like, it's honestly not even for everyone.

00:48:23.160 --> 00:48:37.160
Like at some point, like it's not even enjoyable anymore because it's just, um, but the coolest part about Alinea is at the very end, the dessert that you get is a helium balloon that's made out of apple taffy.

00:48:37.160 --> 00:48:41.160
So it's, they give you a balloon, but you can like scrunch it up and eat it.

00:48:41.160 --> 00:48:42.160
Yeah.

00:48:42.160 --> 00:48:44.160
I think they also change the menu every so often.

00:48:44.160 --> 00:48:45.160
So they might not have that anymore.

00:48:45.160 --> 00:48:47.160
Uh, but that's what they had when we went there.

00:48:47.160 --> 00:48:52.160
Um, and after like a couple more times of this type of experience, I'm just like, okay, this is not for me.

00:48:52.160 --> 00:48:54.160
Cause it, it takes a long time.

00:48:54.160 --> 00:49:00.160
They take you through all these tiny courses and ends up being like a three hour affair typically.

00:49:00.160 --> 00:49:01.160
Yeah.

00:49:01.160 --> 00:49:04.160
And like every time we go, Frank is like this.

00:49:04.160 --> 00:49:05.160
Yeah.

00:49:05.160 --> 00:49:08.160
I'm just thinking like, he's like, I'm about to fall.

00:49:08.160 --> 00:49:09.160
Yeah.

00:49:09.160 --> 00:49:10.160
I'm like tired.

00:49:10.160 --> 00:49:12.160
I'm like not getting my food quick enough.

00:49:12.160 --> 00:49:18.160
Cause like, I'm usually hungry by the time we go, I'd rather just like go to a place and eat a bunch of food.

00:49:18.160 --> 00:49:22.160
Uh, that tastes good, but like comes out in a fast manner.

00:49:22.160 --> 00:49:25.160
And sometimes they'll try to like sit down and talk with you, which I am not into.

00:49:25.160 --> 00:49:26.160
Oh, right.

00:49:26.160 --> 00:49:30.160
So for Valentine's day, we went to this place called parachute in Chicago.

00:49:30.160 --> 00:49:34.160
And the lady was like, Oh, like, are you guys from the Bay area?

00:49:34.160 --> 00:49:35.160
And we're like, yeah.

00:49:35.160 --> 00:49:36.160
Like, how do you know?

00:49:36.160 --> 00:49:39.160
And she was like, Oh, like I can just help by the look of you or something.

00:49:39.160 --> 00:49:43.160
And then, so she was like having small talk and we were like talking about a lot of things.

00:49:43.160 --> 00:49:47.160
And then she was like, she looks over to Frank and was like, Oh, is this your boyfriend?

00:49:47.160 --> 00:49:49.160
Or I think you were my fiance at the time.

00:49:49.160 --> 00:49:52.160
And then she was like, Oh, nice to meet you.

00:49:52.160 --> 00:49:57.160
And Frank was like, yeah, he tries to turn away.

00:49:57.160 --> 00:50:04.160
And then she was like, he's like, he just like hates people.

00:50:04.160 --> 00:50:08.160
It wasn't that exaggerated, but that's pretty much what happened.

00:50:08.160 --> 00:50:11.160
Um, during that time we got really into board games.

00:50:11.160 --> 00:50:16.160
I bought like, I don't know, a hundred or so board games.

00:50:16.160 --> 00:50:17.160
Oh my gosh.

00:50:17.160 --> 00:50:18.160
Frank is a collector.

00:50:18.160 --> 00:50:19.160
Yeah.

00:50:19.160 --> 00:50:22.160
And we, um, I also bought all my Pokemon cards during that time.

00:50:22.160 --> 00:50:30.160
So like in 2018, I basically bought every single holographic Pokemon card from the first 11 sets.

00:50:30.160 --> 00:50:36.160
I also bought every holographic from the first like six or so sets of Yu-Gi-Oh!

00:50:36.160 --> 00:50:38.160
And at that time, Annie was like hating on me so much,

00:50:38.160 --> 00:50:41.160
complaining about how all these cards were coming in all the time,

00:50:41.160 --> 00:50:44.160
which actually ended up being one of my best investments.

00:50:44.160 --> 00:50:46.160
Cause they ended up like 10 X-ing.

00:50:46.160 --> 00:50:47.160
Yeah.

00:50:47.160 --> 00:50:51.160
I think, you know, it's good to kind of address our investment style.

00:50:51.160 --> 00:50:55.160
Like I always, you know, I was brought up with like, you know,

00:50:55.160 --> 00:50:59.160
you got to save what you have and just like save.

00:50:59.160 --> 00:51:00.160
Like, that's the only thing I knew.

00:51:00.160 --> 00:51:07.160
Like I barely invested at that point and I wasn't willing to lose what I put in an investment.

00:51:07.160 --> 00:51:10.160
Whereas Frank is more like optimistic.

00:51:10.160 --> 00:51:12.160
Like he doesn't really think about that.

00:51:12.160 --> 00:51:17.160
He's going to lose that money, but he thinks about what he's going to gain from investing that money.

00:51:17.160 --> 00:51:18.160
Yeah.

00:51:18.160 --> 00:51:20.160
And then Annie's background is she's much more into real estate.

00:51:20.160 --> 00:51:26.160
Like I've never been that much into real estate, which is why she was always looking for either investment properties or buying a house.

00:51:26.160 --> 00:51:33.160
And then for me, I was always looking at crypto stocks or like these collectibles because that's just kind of the stuff that I knew.

00:51:33.160 --> 00:51:34.160
Yeah.

00:51:34.160 --> 00:51:41.160
So I was really unhappy with Frank buying all these to me like garbage because I thought it was such a waste of money.

00:51:41.160 --> 00:51:44.160
Like I would have rather like, you know, save that money.

00:51:44.160 --> 00:51:45.160
Yeah.

00:51:45.160 --> 00:51:54.160
So like another investment I made, I think in the prior year in 2017, I put like 5k into ETH and ETH was only like $50 at the time.

00:51:54.160 --> 00:51:57.160
So I was able to buy a ton of ETH with just 5k.

00:51:57.160 --> 00:51:58.160
But it's like all these things.

00:51:58.160 --> 00:52:02.160
I usually get in pretty early on these trends to get an early on a trend.

00:52:02.160 --> 00:52:04.160
You essentially have to be interested in it.

00:52:04.160 --> 00:52:10.160
And I'm interested in a lot of things, but it's like hard to convince someone who doesn't know a lot about that space.

00:52:10.160 --> 00:52:13.160
So like to Annie's mind, she's like, oh, this is just like children's cardboard.

00:52:13.160 --> 00:52:14.160
Like, how's this valuable?

00:52:14.160 --> 00:52:18.160
But to me, it's like, oh, this is nostalgia for childhood.

00:52:18.160 --> 00:52:22.160
And these are things that are rare that will never be printed again.

00:52:22.160 --> 00:52:25.160
And there's like hundreds of millions of other people who also enjoy this.

00:52:25.160 --> 00:52:27.160
It's the number one franchise in the world.

00:52:27.160 --> 00:52:31.160
And then I think second is Marvel, but there's like a huge gap between the two.

00:52:31.160 --> 00:52:34.160
And so like, eventually it did end up working out.

00:52:34.160 --> 00:52:42.160
And at that time, I wanted to buy more rare cards, but I kind of held back because it was just giving me so much crap every day.

00:52:42.160 --> 00:52:53.160
Every day, a couple of envelopes would come in and he would like open it and like lay it all out on the floor.

00:52:53.160 --> 00:52:59.160
And like he would just sit on the floor, like looking at his cards and like putting them into binders all day.

00:52:59.160 --> 00:53:01.160
It's just such a waste of time.

00:53:01.160 --> 00:53:03.160
Which ended up not being a waste of time.

00:53:03.160 --> 00:53:09.160
But there's lots of stories where it's like, Annie doubts me in the beginning, but then later on I'm proven right.

00:53:09.160 --> 00:53:18.160
But there's also lots of stories where I was wrong eventually, which I talk more about in like my investing and finance podcast slash TikToks if people are interested.

00:53:18.160 --> 00:53:19.160
Yeah.

00:53:19.160 --> 00:53:23.160
Oh, we actually also bought our first investment property.

00:53:23.160 --> 00:53:24.160
Oh, yeah.

00:53:24.160 --> 00:53:29.160
And I was super against the idea at the time because I was like, well, mostly just because I didn't understand it as well.

00:53:29.160 --> 00:53:32.160
Because I was really familiar with like stocks, crypto and these collectibles.

00:53:32.160 --> 00:53:39.160
So like the situation was almost flipped or in the sense where I was like, no, like real estate is a bubble, blah, blah, blah.

00:53:39.160 --> 00:53:40.160
Yeah.

00:53:40.160 --> 00:53:43.160
And rightfully so, because I don't do research.

00:53:43.160 --> 00:53:47.160
Like, so basically I went to Toronto by myself.

00:53:47.160 --> 00:53:51.160
One of my friends is like a developer or he works for a developer.

00:53:51.160 --> 00:53:56.160
And there was like a friends and family event where you can get in on these like deals early.

00:53:56.160 --> 00:53:59.160
And so I basically came back and Frank and I weren't married at the time.

00:53:59.160 --> 00:54:05.160
Like, yeah, I think we were about to be married on paper soon at this point, but we weren't married.

00:54:05.160 --> 00:54:06.160
And so I came back.

00:54:06.160 --> 00:54:08.160
I'm like, babe, we got to invest in this.

00:54:08.160 --> 00:54:11.160
And like, again, we didn't have that much money at the time.

00:54:11.160 --> 00:54:18.160
But the whole point of like getting a development or pre-construction is that you have a lot of leverage.

00:54:18.160 --> 00:54:24.160
And so you only need to pay 10% like for the first like three years or something.

00:54:24.160 --> 00:54:30.160
And so it was just a feeling that I had that this was going to be a good project.

00:54:30.160 --> 00:54:31.160
Yeah.

00:54:31.160 --> 00:54:34.160
And like we fought about it because I would ask her all these questions and she'd be like, I don't know.

00:54:34.160 --> 00:54:35.160
I don't know.

00:54:35.160 --> 00:54:36.160
I don't know.

00:54:36.160 --> 00:54:37.160
Don't ask me.

00:54:37.160 --> 00:54:39.160
Like, I don't know how to explain this.

00:54:39.160 --> 00:54:41.160
But eventually, yeah, we did buy it.

00:54:41.160 --> 00:54:46.160
And the investment did end up working out in the sense that like we've made money on it.

00:54:46.160 --> 00:54:49.160
Not like a ton of money, but like a decent amount.

00:54:49.160 --> 00:54:53.160
So yeah, bringing it back to our marriage story a little bit.

00:54:53.160 --> 00:54:56.160
At this point, Annie's done most of the preparations.

00:54:56.160 --> 00:54:58.160
We're going to our wedding destination.

00:54:58.160 --> 00:55:00.160
We've invited all of our family and friends.

00:55:00.160 --> 00:55:03.160
It's going to be around 200 people for the total.

00:55:03.160 --> 00:55:05.160
No, no, it was only like 70 people.

00:55:05.160 --> 00:55:06.160
Oh, 70.

00:55:06.160 --> 00:55:07.160
Okay.

00:55:07.160 --> 00:55:12.160
And so it's much bigger than I would have liked, but still smaller than like a super mega wedding.

00:55:12.160 --> 00:55:13.160
Yeah.

00:55:13.160 --> 00:55:15.160
And surprisingly, you go through that list.

00:55:15.160 --> 00:55:17.160
Like it adds up really quickly.

00:55:17.160 --> 00:55:19.160
We actually saved probably over like $10,000.

00:55:19.160 --> 00:55:21.160
Yeah, probably more than that.

00:55:21.160 --> 00:55:24.160
I mean, so we were pretty lucky in a few cents.

00:55:24.160 --> 00:55:29.160
Like the venue that we got is like an unconventional venue place.

00:55:29.160 --> 00:55:30.160
It's like really nice.

00:55:30.160 --> 00:55:32.160
It's on top of a mountain.

00:55:32.160 --> 00:55:37.160
But it's not typically used as a wedding venue.

00:55:37.160 --> 00:55:40.160
It's usually like a ski resort.

00:55:40.160 --> 00:55:45.160
And so that's why they gave it out for like such a cheap price.

00:55:45.160 --> 00:55:49.160
And then we also did all the flowers ourselves.

00:55:49.160 --> 00:55:52.160
My dad and I are both like very DIY people.

00:55:52.160 --> 00:55:55.160
So like we did all the decorations and the flowers ourselves.

00:55:55.160 --> 00:55:57.160
I also made my own cake.

00:55:57.160 --> 00:56:05.160
And the part that we spent the most amount of money on is the videographer and the photographer,

00:56:05.160 --> 00:56:10.160
which were like really important to me and like my side of the family.

00:56:10.160 --> 00:56:12.160
Like we just like want all the memories.

00:56:12.160 --> 00:56:18.160
That ended up being like $10,000 out of our like $30,000 budget.

00:56:18.160 --> 00:56:21.160
It ended up being extremely worth it in my opinion.

00:56:21.160 --> 00:56:26.160
Like we had a ton of really good pictures that I still use to this day for random stuff.

00:56:26.160 --> 00:56:27.160
Like we have really good headshots.

00:56:27.160 --> 00:56:29.160
They're very professional.

00:56:29.160 --> 00:56:33.160
Shout out to Cliff Ma from Cliff Ma Photography in Vancouver.

00:56:33.160 --> 00:56:37.160
If you guys have a chance to plan your wedding photos, definitely check him out.

00:56:37.160 --> 00:56:43.160
Yeah, he does very like candid, like happy, natural shots.

00:56:43.160 --> 00:56:47.160
So our photos are definitely like the highlight.

00:56:47.160 --> 00:56:54.160
Yeah, I think the week or maybe I don't know what time before the wedding, we get in another huge fight.

00:56:54.160 --> 00:56:55.160
Yeah.

00:56:56.160 --> 00:57:00.160
So I think you talked about it on the TikTok.

00:57:00.160 --> 00:57:01.160
Is that the fight you were talking about?

00:57:01.160 --> 00:57:02.160
Yeah, yeah.

00:57:02.160 --> 00:57:07.160
So what ends up happening is we meet with our, with one of Annie's good friends, Cherry.

00:57:07.160 --> 00:57:10.160
The same friend that we've basically been talking about.

00:57:10.160 --> 00:57:11.160
Talking about the podcast.

00:57:11.160 --> 00:57:12.160
Yeah.

00:57:12.160 --> 00:57:13.160
At like this cafe.

00:57:13.160 --> 00:57:15.160
And I don't know what leads into this.

00:57:15.160 --> 00:57:19.160
Like Cherry maybe asked Annie about her YouTube channel or something and like how it's going.

00:57:19.160 --> 00:57:27.160
And basically when Annie started the YouTube channel, she made like her own rule of like, oh, I'll make one video per week or something like that.

00:57:27.160 --> 00:57:31.160
Yeah, I promise I was going to do one upload per week.

00:57:31.160 --> 00:57:42.160
But it ended up being a lot harder because like I did cakes or like baking and it actually takes so much effort to like bake a cake and I decorate it in like amazing fashion.

00:57:42.160 --> 00:57:52.160
Like it, you know, like I did like a unicorn cake and like I did a Pikachu cake and it takes a long time and so much effort and that cake just like goes to waste.

00:57:52.160 --> 00:57:57.160
Like if I was doing a cake every single week, like we will have so much cake.

00:57:57.160 --> 00:58:01.160
And now I see on TikTok people have like these dummy cakes.

00:58:01.160 --> 00:58:05.160
I wish I had known about that because it would have saved so much time.

00:58:05.160 --> 00:58:12.160
Basically, I did not do one cake per week and I burnt out really fast, too, because it was just not enjoyable for me.

00:58:12.160 --> 00:58:14.160
Like I didn't want to do cakes.

00:58:14.160 --> 00:58:20.160
And also I was like eating a lot of it, which is not good for my health because like she would make something and be like, oh, it's a waste just to throw it away.

00:58:20.160 --> 00:58:22.160
So I try to eat some.

00:58:22.160 --> 00:58:24.160
But yeah, eventually.

00:58:24.160 --> 00:58:27.160
So this topic came up in this cafe with Cherry.

00:58:27.160 --> 00:58:30.160
And I'm basically like, oh, like Annie stopped.

00:58:30.160 --> 00:58:31.160
Like she doesn't have the willpower.

00:58:31.160 --> 00:58:36.160
Like there's no way she can be an entrepreneur because like the topic was around like Annie starting something.

00:58:36.160 --> 00:58:41.160
And I was saying basically saying like, oh, like she can't do it because of like she failed doing this YouTube thing.

00:58:41.160 --> 00:58:45.160
Yeah. But then you said it in a really mean way where you were like, you lied to me.

00:58:45.160 --> 00:58:48.160
And I was like, I didn't lie to you.

00:58:48.160 --> 00:58:54.160
Like I fully started this with the intention of like trying to go through with it, but it just didn't work out that way.

00:58:54.160 --> 00:58:56.160
And you're like, no, you lied to me.

00:58:56.160 --> 00:58:58.160
And then so I got really upset, obviously.

00:58:58.160 --> 00:59:02.160
And then we kind of decided to leave the cafe and leave Cherry.

00:59:02.160 --> 00:59:07.160
But we proceeded to like fight the whole way to our like transportation.

00:59:07.160 --> 00:59:10.160
Like we were taking the public transportation.

00:59:10.160 --> 00:59:14.160
And so I was like really upset.

00:59:14.160 --> 00:59:20.160
And this is the day before our wedding, like the day before we are supposed to get married.

00:59:20.160 --> 00:59:26.160
Um, we were already legally married, but we were having the, you know, the family friend ceremony.

00:59:26.160 --> 00:59:33.160
And so, you know, being a girl usually, you know, wine and like, you're just like, well, fine.

00:59:33.160 --> 00:59:34.160
Now I want to break up.

00:59:34.160 --> 00:59:35.160
Right.

00:59:35.160 --> 00:59:37.160
And you expect the guy to be like, oh, I'm so sorry, babe.

00:59:37.160 --> 00:59:39.160
Like, I didn't mean that.

00:59:39.160 --> 00:59:41.160
And so I pulled out that card.

00:59:41.160 --> 00:59:43.160
I was like, okay, fine.

00:59:43.160 --> 00:59:45.160
I just don't think that this is going to work out.

00:59:45.160 --> 00:59:47.160
And I think we should break up.

00:59:47.160 --> 00:59:50.160
And Frank was like, yeah, I agree.

00:59:50.160 --> 00:59:52.160
We should call off the wedding.

00:59:52.160 --> 00:59:55.160
And I was like, what?

00:59:55.160 --> 00:59:56.160
Frank just got so upset.

00:59:56.160 --> 01:00:02.160
He was just like, yeah, no, like, and then so he just started walking off by himself.

01:00:02.160 --> 01:00:06.160
And then I was like, okay, like, we can't do that.

01:00:06.160 --> 01:00:08.160
Like, this is literally the day before the wedding.

01:00:08.160 --> 01:00:09.160
So I'm like chasing him.

01:00:09.160 --> 01:00:12.160
I'm like, again, this is not my fault.

01:00:12.160 --> 01:00:13.160
Like this is me.

01:00:13.160 --> 01:00:15.160
This is Frank being an asshole to me.

01:00:15.160 --> 01:00:18.160
So I'm like chasing him and be like, I'm so sorry.

01:00:18.160 --> 01:00:20.160
Like, I didn't mean to say that.

01:00:20.160 --> 01:00:21.160
Like, I'm so sorry.

01:00:21.160 --> 01:00:24.160
Like, can we please not break up?

01:00:24.160 --> 01:00:25.160
Yeah.

01:00:25.160 --> 01:00:30.160
I mean, there's like other stuff that happened, but like, it's mostly just us arguing over.

01:00:30.160 --> 01:00:36.160
Cause like, it's not just the fight itself, but it's like, we would also bring up a bunch of past things that happened to support our arguments.

01:00:36.160 --> 01:00:40.160
Cause like at this point we've been dating for like two or three years or something like that.

01:00:40.160 --> 01:00:46.160
And so there's like, when you have a fight with your significant other, it's usually not just about the fight.

01:00:46.160 --> 01:00:51.160
But then also like all the things that happened prior in your relationship.

01:00:51.160 --> 01:00:55.160
And it kind of just like builds and builds and like each party gets more and more upset.

01:00:55.160 --> 01:00:59.160
Um, and my thing has always been like, I don't want to support bad behavior.

01:00:59.160 --> 01:01:02.160
So like if Annie is being whiny or something, I'm like, well, I'm not going to give into this.

01:01:02.160 --> 01:01:06.160
Cause like, this is not what I want to reward and what I want to see in the future.

01:01:06.160 --> 01:01:11.160
Yeah. I always describe Frank as like, or the way that he treats me.

01:01:11.160 --> 01:01:13.160
Like he doesn't treat me like a spouse.

01:01:13.160 --> 01:01:18.160
He treats me like a employee that he holds to a very high standard.

01:01:18.160 --> 01:01:21.160
No, no, no, no, no. I treat you like someone I, okay.

01:01:21.160 --> 01:01:24.160
So I always tell Annie, I expect her to be better than me in every single way.

01:01:24.160 --> 01:01:28.160
Like I treat, I have such high expectations of her because I believe in her.

01:01:28.160 --> 01:01:31.160
But then her interpretation is like, oh, well don't believe in me.

01:01:31.160 --> 01:01:33.160
Like I have no expectations.

01:01:33.160 --> 01:01:34.160
Just let me do whatever.

01:01:34.160 --> 01:01:40.160
Yeah. I just want to be protected and loved, like forgiven for whatever fault that I have.

01:01:40.160 --> 01:01:42.160
Like always be like, babe, do you love me?

01:01:42.160 --> 01:01:43.160
And he'll be like, yes.

01:01:43.160 --> 01:01:44.160
And I'm like forever.

01:01:44.160 --> 01:01:46.160
And he's like, no, it depends on you.

01:01:46.160 --> 01:01:49.160
Like it's just like so unromantic.

01:01:49.160 --> 01:01:51.160
Or if she like killed someone, right?

01:01:51.160 --> 01:01:54.160
Or if she cheats on me, like clearly it does depend on some factors.

01:01:54.160 --> 01:01:56.160
That's not what I want to hear, right?

01:01:56.160 --> 01:02:01.160
Essentially what ends up happening is we do make up, we have the wedding, everything goes fine.

01:02:01.160 --> 01:02:05.160
But essentially like, that's kind of the full journey.

01:02:05.160 --> 01:02:08.160
Like clearly a lot has happened after we got married.

01:02:08.160 --> 01:02:15.160
I think what kind of sums it up really well is our relationship has been like a rollercoaster

01:02:15.160 --> 01:02:17.160
in terms of like ups and downs.

01:02:17.160 --> 01:02:18.160
The highs are really high.

01:02:18.160 --> 01:02:19.160
The lows are really low.

01:02:19.160 --> 01:02:24.160
So because Annie and I actually fought so much throughout our entire relationship,

01:02:24.160 --> 01:02:26.160
it actually made both of us into better people.

01:02:26.160 --> 01:02:29.160
Like Annie has become much more patient.

01:02:29.160 --> 01:02:33.160
I've become a lot better at communication, even though there's still a lot to be improved.

01:02:33.160 --> 01:02:35.160
Like I've worked on it a lot.

01:02:35.160 --> 01:02:38.160
I've also learned to be a lot more patient.

01:02:38.160 --> 01:02:41.160
And like we've rubbed off a lot on each other.

01:02:41.160 --> 01:02:44.160
So I'm able to see other people's perspective a lot more.

01:02:44.160 --> 01:02:50.160
Whereas before I was much more like self-centric the way that I thought and just like my logical approach to things.

01:02:50.160 --> 01:02:55.160
Whereas now I kind of take more of like the emotional side or like other people's perspective.

01:02:55.160 --> 01:03:01.160
Whereas like Annie now also can see like a lot of the rational reasonings behind the way that I do things in the way that I think.

01:03:01.160 --> 01:03:05.160
And so we're both growing as people.

01:03:05.160 --> 01:03:13.160
And like without the other person, we would both have been worse off, in my opinion, just because we have a lot of strengths that the other does not.

01:03:13.160 --> 01:03:17.160
And we've actually complemented each other really well.

01:03:17.160 --> 01:03:20.160
And like even to this day, we continue to grow.

01:03:20.160 --> 01:03:22.160
We continue to learn how to communicate better.

01:03:22.160 --> 01:03:31.160
Obviously, if anyone who's been in a relationship knows there's tons of compromises, but essentially it's like you tackle problems together as a team.

01:03:31.160 --> 01:03:36.160
Like whenever we have success, like it's our success rather than individual success.

01:03:36.160 --> 01:03:40.160
Even though I like to always claim all the success for myself.

01:03:40.160 --> 01:03:46.160
And so I guess like that kind of wraps up this episode of Frankly Speaking.

01:03:46.160 --> 01:03:49.160
Thank you everyone for listening to our love story.

01:03:49.160 --> 01:03:59.160
It started off with Craigslist and has ended with two little baby boys, a successful and happy marriage and all of you listening to us.

01:03:59.160 --> 01:04:03.160
Thanks for listening to the Frankly Speaking podcast and we'll see you later.